Auro
To start, I completely sympathize with not getting the experience and first impression you were expecting. I'm insanely frustrated by the inability to use custom configs and the problems I've encountered around that. From the software/firmware side, they do seem to have been released prematurely (closer to a Beta state than final product) or at least not received the level of quality control that I would expect from a product at this price point. For that, I completely understand choosing to send your T4 back. At the same time, though, I don't think the Twiddlers have as poor a physical design as it seems you're suggesting. I'm also not trying to change your mind, by the way, only provide a bit of reasonable counterpoint. (And no, I have no connection with or investment in Tek Gear, except as a member of the general public who bought a T4 and who would like to see it reach the quality I thought it was already supposed to have. Yes, there's some bitterness there, but I buy into premature tech often enough that I'm mostly okay waiting it out - not everyone is nor should they be.)
I don't disagree there are places for improvement in the design (wish we still had a thumbstick instead of the little trackpad, for instance), but, to clarify what I previously mentioned, the time spent was in obtaining muscle memory, not in finding a position. Even then, it was only for the one hand. With my other hand I had no such ergonomics issues because my thumb is slightly longer on that hand. (Yay, natural human asymmetry. /s) Several people, particularly on the T3 forum, chimed in on discomfort discussions to say it fit them just fine, so I chalk it up to my hand shape, which tends towards short-fingered and proportionally wide while being small overall (the joys of being 5'4").
Having a Quest 2 & Quest 3, I took a quick look at both sets of controllers. If you were to take the same 3x5 button grid as the Twiddler has and put it on a Quest controller I think you would still not have the comfort you are suggesting. Certainly, I had no stability when emulating Twiddler-type movements with my fingers and would have a far worse time hitting the desired buttons on such a curved surface. Comparing with the T4, I would say the reasons the Quest controllers wouldn't work for one-handed keyboards are a combination of the angle in which they sit in the hand, size, weight distribution, and contour. Those also happen to all be things that make those controllers great for games, though.
Trying to compare these to Quest controllers is a bit disingenuous, anyway. Gaming controllers, which those are, require very little in the way of dexterity or finger movement. Their design is static by comparison, especially if you consider that thumb and finger movements are inherently asynchronous on gaming controllers. I'm not referring to fine adjustments such as tilting a joy stick or half-pressing a trigger, but in the actual relocation of contact between the skin and controller; few if any games have frequent occassion to simultaneously move thumbs and fingers to new buttons, something absolutely inherent to the Twiddler as a keyboard alternative.
Outside of the strap attachment on the bar (and even then only for 1 of my hands), I find the ergonomics of the T4 to be quite acceptable. Do I wish they'd offer the T3 straps for use with the T4s? Certainly, but that's because I like customization I don't actually have to do myself.
As for the noise, while I completely understand that it's a problem for some people, I quite like it. They may have used the cheapest buttons they could find (I don't know either way), but sound does not guarantee it. The cost of custom keyboards, many of which include intentionally audible keys (be they "clicky", "clacky", or "thuddy"), makes that quite clear. I have a fullsize keyboard that I personally find to be beautifully "clacky", like the typewriters I grew up with. At $1000 usd, I considered it an investment in making typing (which I do a lot of for work and recreation) more enjoyable. I found both the T4s I've used to be "clickier" than that keyboard, but not uncomfortably loud. Ambient noise from most of the environments I find myself in made the T4s nearly unnoticeable in my experience. That's personal preference, though, and it's also possible that your T4 is louder for some reason.